Love is….

Not so long ago I heard a song about love, in it was one verse, saying: “love is pain”; it’s commonly accepted nowadays, that love is pain, suffering, fear. We really can read about that everywhere, we can see that in movies, we can hear that in a lot of songs. That’s so real for us, that we think, we actually feel it: “ohh, I’m crying now, because of love”.

There is really a lot of things, a lot of emotions, wrongly associated with love. For example: is love fear? It isn’t, of course not; can I feel pain, because of love? I can’t - of course not. Love is: just love, it’s simple and positive. Fear, is another emotion (or state of mind), which may appear in company of love, but it isn’t love. Just like I’m not someone with who I enter the room, or in other words, if two persons enter my room - one really good, positive and nice, and other violent, annoying and negative, are those two persons one? Well, I think the answer is obvious: of course NOT!

However, love doesn’t come in company of fear, neither in company of pain or suffering, as much as in company of desire. There’s a lot of cases, a lot states which are actually completely without love, - there’s just desire, but we wrongly perceive it, as the greatest love of our life.

Desire causing suffering. As we desire someone, who we can’t have, or as we desire something, that actually even doesn’t exists, we’re generating a lot of suffering, a lot of pain. And when our desire isn’t fulfilled, it’s growing, and growing, and with this growing desire, we’re experiencing more and more pain, and we’re suffering more and more. But, we can’t blame love, right? Love isn’t connected to that at all, actually, love is quite opposite, we can’t suffer because of someone, who we truly love.

Now, there is another strange idea about love: that love can’t exist without desire. This idea is just as wrong as the idea, that we can’t be happy without money. But the fact it, that true happiness exists, out of boundaries of materialistic world. Money is more obstacle than advantage in being truly happy. The same is with love, real love, isn’t in boundaries of desire, it isn’t even associated with desire, and desire is just an obstacle on achieving real love.

Real love, isn’t something someone feel towards one special person, but it’s general. Real love, isn’t divided between people, but it’s core feeling, and it can be in every relationship. Actually, towards more persons we feel it, more real it is; or in other words: more we’re loving, more love we have. More we’re reserving love for just one special person, for just one categorical relationship, less love we have, and less real that love is.

Love actually isn’t something we would feel because of someone, but it’s just something we feel.

Love is core, of every good relationship, either is it between man and woman, between parent and child or between friends. In different cases it’s accompaniment by different emotions, and in different type of relationships, we’re doing different activities - while we don’t have sex with friends, we have it with our partner; but the love is core and it’s the same emotion in both cases.

So, we’re very unfair, when blaming love for our suffering. I think, it’s even dangerous to blame love, since if we do so, we start growing some fears and misconceptions about love; we’re also totally failing to see the true cause of our suffering.

To conclude: love is one emotion (it isn’t divided), and it’s pointed towards more people, it’s always positive, and it’s separated off other emotions. Love is growing, the more we’re sharing it. More we’re saving our love, for certain circumstances, less love we’re able to give, and less pure that love is.