Wise up!

Lets talk about suffering, about difficulties in life and about “overcoming” them, shall we?
I can’t imagine with what else to start, if not with Buddha’s first noble truth, which saying (simply enough) that life is suffering, meaning that sooner or later we’ll suffer somehow. Buddhism of course, offering answer on how to end suffering, actually - that’s the fourth noble truth.

Now that we know that life is suffering, with that in mind, we can look around. If I look around, for example, I see so many people suffering (because of) many causes: some are sick, some wanting(!) love - or better said relationship, some has experienced some personal trauma.

The way how we understand the suffering, is a bit confusing and mostly wrong. We mostly feel, that suffering has absolutely no meaning. Since people mostly think their suffering is meaningless, they’re not looking for a meaning - they fail to see meaning, so the meaning stays overlooked and unrealized. Result: their suffering really is meaningless and unproductive.

Since we mostly failing to see meaning, we’re looking for a quick fix, - maybe pills, maybe some therapy. Anthony de Mello said: “Even the best psychologist will tell you that, that people don’t really want to be cured. What they want is relief; a cure is painful.” Ahhh. So true. Cure is painful, since it does require a change. But people wanna quickly eliminate the suffering, and stay absolutely the same. Of course, things just don’t work like that.

I said before, that suffering has meaning, and the meaning is: the call of our life, the big shake of our life, the alert, the sign: “it’s time for a change, you’re doing something wrong!” And the fact is, we can’t deceive our life, .. we can deceive everything and everybody (even ourselves), but not our life.

The suffering is process, and it most likely won’t stop - until we realize it, and make some changes. Like in great song by Aimee Mann:

It’s not going to stop ‘Til you wise up.

We don’t wanna change, it’s amazing, people would rather die, than change. So they keep suffering, as suffering seems easier than the change. I heard people saying: “I’d rather die, than stop eating *some kind of* food”, or “I’d rather die, than give up smoking”. They don’t even try, and they really do - soon enough - die.

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results” – Albert Einstein

When suffering become just too much, too loud, too big, we can start realizing good sides of it. The suffering can bring us back to ourselves, it can eliminate all the noise that’s going on in our life, and focus our view on more important things: self-realization, our inner world.

Really, the suffering, can make us a better person, a more aware person. But it’s necessary, to realize the meaning of it. When we finally do realize the meaning, does suffering stop? Well, I said in the beginning, life is suffering. If I have fatal disease, I’ll still feel pain; or I can be still single (and alone) as I was before, or if someone had trauma in past, that won’t just go away.

“Before enlightenment, I used to be depressed: after enlightenment, I continue to be depressed. But there’s a difference: I don’t identify with it anymore. Do you know what a big difference that is?” — Anthony de Mello

Do you know? “Before, when the rainy days came, I felt like a clouds, now I feel like a sky. Calmly observing them, passing over.” When I found at lease some meaning in my suffering, when that happened, things started to change. Indeed, I was still as I was before, but yet different. I start realizing things, I start realizing myself. When I look back on my life, I see what a big and important role suffering played in my life, and how drastically changed me. Without doubt changed me to better.

To be honest - sometimes, I want a new wave of suffering, as I realized what a big power is in it. How much energy, and how that energy can be transformed into something creative, how that energy can push me forward. When I suffer, I look mostly for what needs to be changed, what needs to be realized, I don’t search for quick solutions anymore.

We sometimes don’t wanna wake up early in the morning, but when we finally do, we see priceless sunrise, wonderful morning, full of life, so fresh and relaxing. What the realization of suffering brings, is just as beautiful and full of life as the morning is. We must just open our eyes, and wake up.

Of course, this doesn’t cover all types of suffering. For example, probably it’s unfair to expect that a kid who has nothing to eat, will realize some higher meaning in his suffering. I was mostly talking about spoiled society, who suffer mostly because of some bad habits, and wrong views on life. Instead they’d actually try to do something, to realize something, they’re putting all energy into search for a quick fix. On other hand, if we’re able to lost ourselves in our suffering, to disconnect off our body, and ideas - the suffering (that’s believe in many religions) could brought higher realization.